Parenting Grown Children: What Dr. Spock Forgot to Tell Us

Social Media Etiquette: It's a no-no to post grandkid photos

Lives there a grannie or gramps so dull who is not at the ready to pull out their iPhone and show off photos of their Grands--videos and stills, group shots and solos. We're all a little besotted when it comes to sharing the adorableness of our grandkids.

But it's one thing to let friends hold our phone and watch our precious toddler pulling a truck through a puddle--so cute. It's another to post that video or photo on Facebook or Instagram or another social media platform.

Here's a summary of advice I read on Katie Couric's Media site about posting photos of children; it applies to us and our grandkids especially: 

Even if you have strong privacy settings in place on your accounts, don't post photos of the grands unless and until you know the parents' social media rules and, should your grands be a few years older than toddler, ask them for permission as well. "It helps teach them how to respectfully use social media in the future," writes author Mary Agnant.

The rules do not apply to grandpups. Here's one of mine.

photos: child, pexels; puppy, Palo Coleman

 

Grown Kids and Their Pets: Another family member to worry about

photo credit: P. Coleman.                 Tao in her prime.       

Our daughter's dog is in pain. She has been diagnosed with cancer. Tao--a "rescue" dog that is part black lab, part white-spotted sheep dog--is the sweetheart of the family. Indulged. Loved. Petted. Patted. Scratched (She prefers a vigorous rub behind the ears.) Walked often. Fed with various treats. She has pride of place in the family car. She walks with a jaunt to her step when she's taken to a coffee shop or on an errand. She is docile but alert when tied to a post outside the store--she bides her time with dignity. She has her favorite stops--mostly shops that offer her a doggie treat or a snuggle and a greeting by name.

Everyone loves Tao. And now it is hard to see her in pain and to see our daughter and her family wrestling with what to do. The tumor has been biopsied and tests have been run. The cancer is aggressive. It is no longer just in her leg--that rules out amputation.  They are talking to the veterinary oncologist about chemotherapy. It took 3 weeks to get an appointment with the vet oncologist. What does that say about families, the deep affection they have for their pets and the depths to which those who can afford it (or barely afford it) will go to keep them alive and, hopefully, well.

 It is so easy to say that we can do for our pets what we can't do for our human loved ones: We can put them down and out of unendurable pain when the time comes. But I can see that such a decision is not one my daughter and her family are willing to talk about right now. They are focused on helping Tao feel better. If she can't be cured, they are intent on keeping her out of pain, whatever the cost and for however long they can.

Tao was my first Grand pet and is my only Grand Pup. (I also have two Grand bunnies as well. One of them has had severe health issues.) So here I sit, hundreds of miles from the scene, feeling sad and helpless to give aid or comfort. A member of the family is in pain. Parenting grown children extends to caring and worrying about their pets as well.

photo credit: P. Coleman                        Tao exercising her senior rights.